There’s a common saying regarding raising a child. You’ve heard it, I’m sure, a million times before; it goes a little something like this – “it takes a village.” As I think on this phrase I have to say that LIFE takes a village.. ADULTING takes a village.. Getting through grad school one existential crisis after another, takes a village. But you know what? I’ve learned there’s something that is more unique than a village; and that’s a tribe.
A tribe could be a group of any number of individuals with various quirks and personalities and helpful life hacks. You learn valuable lessons from your tribe: fashion tips, dating tips, job market search, real estate search, and how to get through your current focus with a full head of hair. Your tribe will typically have special names for each other or catch phrase/inside jokes you mutter to each other in code.. If you are like me, you may have the luck of knowing one or two or more of these fabulous people
The Brownie to my Blondie (or vice versa): This person is closely tied to the old “ride or die” type friend. The one who will allow your ranting, nonsensical, multitexting to complete it’s cycle before giving a well thought out and enlightened response. Or will simply give you that slap of reality you desperately need, even if you won’t admit it to yourself. You go to this person when you need them to tell you whether or not you are being a “bit dramatic” and to help you rationalize through your erratic and sometimes impulsive behaviors.
The Peanut Butter to my Oreo: Similarly to the Brownie-Blondie friend, this valued tribe member falls under the category of “partner in crime.” This is the friend you have maintained through the years. You’ve experienced bad hair cuts, even worse break-ups, and unbearable hangovers. No matter the situation, this pal is always willing to jump in the passenger seat for a car karaoke, dance party, adventure. You have literally seen each other at their worst time and probably have had a falling out or two, but can quickly return to your SVU/Harry Potter/Disney movie marathoning Sundays on the couch. *important note, this friend is likely one to have a significant other that accepts and encourages the weirdness you two share*
The Duckie: This friend can take one of two personas – Duckie from Land Before Time OR Duckie from the John Hughes Classic Pretty in Pink. Either way, this is the tribe member you go to when you need an instant pick-me up. Whether it is comparing the level of joke your life is on to crying incoherently over the phone about the newest drama in your life. This friend always manages to keep a positive outlook on life, even without meaning to – and even when they may not be internally feeling that positive about themselves. This pal has a flair for style and fun that can match no other guaranteeing you a great time whatever the occasion!
The Blunt One: We all have one. This is the friend you may have a love-hate relationship with, but mostly love. You know how to test each other’s limits and when it’s best to leave those buttons unpushed. This tribe member tells it how it is regardless of if you want to hear it or not. They are great listeners and, even better, they actually understand what you are talking about – either through personal experience or just because of their natural ability as an empath. **special note: it is possible to have two blunt members of your tribe, you will quickly learn who the alpha is in the situation and the secondary will quickly identify as a different persona to you**
The Token Male (or Female): Considering your tribe is primarily one gender (yes I’m going by GENDER as in how they identify as a human being, not their biological sex assigned at birth!) this is the member who will be the one and only gender outsider. Regardless, this person holds a very key role in your tribe. This person is your sarcasm-sparring go to. You can text some vague comment and expect an outrageous, fabulous, and very possibly sexual response. This is another pal you have had for years and maybe even at one point were considered for your senior superlative page as “cutest couple that never was” but were nixed when your co-partner decided to go for “most changed” – not bitter, still love them.
The Ambidextrous One: In this case, I’m talking more than the ability to use both right and left hands for various tasks. This tribe member imbibes more than one characteristics of the above mentioned. They are blunt when it’s necessary (and know when to sugar coat depending on your emotional state), they give excellent advice and cheer you on and persuade you that you are not failing at the whole adulting life. They always know how to make you smile and have a contagious laugh. Overall, they are the glue that holds multiple of your tribe members together.
Some people have one tribe. Some people have multiple. I’m lucky and proud to have such a fantastic group of people in my life that share in my ups and downs, laughter and tears, celebrations and pitfalls. What makes a tribe special is that they are YOURS.
So to my fabulous tribe ladies (and man) know that I love you from the bottom of my heart! From the tips of my toes to the top of my head! All the way to the moon and back! Ya’ll are the bomb.com and I wouldn’t trade any of you for anything.